Outsourced Staff - Because spiders aren't the only pest crawling in Australia

Finally, a vendor that restores Australia's glorious days of penitentiary punishment.

Our Value Hypothesis (peer-reviewed by a spreadsheet)

When your costs look bloated, do what leaders do: rename people into “capacity units” and watch the compassion evaporate right off the P&L.

  • Dignity-Neutral Pricing™: charges optimized for things that are definitely not living situations.
  • Timezone Arbitrage: the sun moves; your KPIs don’t. We chose a side.
  • Compliance-Shaped Paperwork: contains words like “contract” and “benefits” in a pleasing order.
  • Managed Empathy Layer: optional, toggled off by default to improve margins by 0.7%.*

*Internal study. Sample size: one executive with a marker and a glass wall.

7–14dSpeed-to-“Unit”
24/7Always-On Expectations
98%Jargon Coverage
0Acknowledged Humans*

*In marketing materials only. Reality may contain people.

Team Formats (collect them all)

  • Solo Contributor: a single highly skilled person you’ll accidentally call “resource” in meetings.
  • Managed Squad: 3–10 people plus a supervisor with a stick.
  • Burst Pod: on-demand specialists for your quarterly “how is it already Friday” emergencies.

All formats come with (spotty) electricity, (some) internet, and a baffling tolerance for your ticketing system.

FAFO

Use Cases We Pretend Are Novel

  • Customer support that replies faster than your product ships.
  • Data operations that gently correct your dashboards’ delusions.
  • Sales that find inventory you “accidentally” promised to six clients.
  • Prompt engineers who fix your chatbot’s existential crisis at 3 a.m.

Also available: managers who manage your cheap labor.